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Franis
dialoguers
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From A Dialoguer Who Writes
I'm happy to offer the benefit of my observations. I would love to know how or if you can use what I've been exploring here.

If you'd like to contact me personally to get in touch, check out my website.

August 2009
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Franis [userpic]
Really Meeting Our E-Meets

I wrote this eons ago when I took a trip up to visit Linda, with whom I had been dialoguing with for over a year. Well, I actually went to visit many more people than just Linda, but that's besides the point.

--- Linda wrote:
> let me barge into what's going on to blurt out:
>
> FRANIS Is EVERYWHERE
>
> okay, so she was just in Eugene, OR this week, but I met
> her and this was quite something.
>
> ...

> I saw her walking down the hall and I was
> immediately puzzled to not "recognize" her. and
> after the evening was done, i felt as though her
> in-person-ness was a family resemblance to her
> e-voice, but not exactly same person. i wondered if
> i am. i wondered if we're all just a loose
> association of different states...and there's less
> consistency between them than we'd like to
> believe...
>
> the lindas
>

Meeting Linda after getting to know her here was an experience not to be missed. I recommend it to all here! If you ever get the chance, it would be wonderful if at least some of us could get together in person somewhere and do the dialogue thing, or merely get to know each other in the flesh.

My first impression now that I'm home was how much we have found out about each other in dialogue here...and how much time that would take to know all of that by conveying it in person, talking. I'm so much faster of a reader, and more patient than I am to hear the same
information. While I was with Linda, it was almost as if I wanted to tear myself open and evoke the level of intimacy that I often respond to when Linda writes...But there was the fact that in reality we are strangers to each other's bodies so the social mores and the table between us was in place. Then again, it wasn't. The back and forth from knowing her and both not knowing her was fascinating.

Sequential words seem to go so slow in relationship to how much I can soak up when I'm reading. So for me, the fact that you all type to me means I can absorb it so much faster than if you were talking. There's no competition for sequential time when I'm taking the time to read. Of course, the time I had to talk with Linda went by sooooo much to much tooooo fast. I just have to come back to Eugene and spend lots more time hanging out with Linda to feel satisfied that I do, indeed, know her.

My impression of Linda in person as opposed to Linda e-mail was first what I mentioned - looking at her mugging what she means when she talked added an encyclopedia to what she meant, because her expressions were so easy for me to identify with. Because also when Linda writes it's often succinct, so I had to imagine the sense of how she was saying it. She's got a rubber face, as I seem to use when I talk, so that delighted me. That's where I meant I saw the same sense of humor that I imagined, because I was adding in the exaggerated facial expressions that I might have used. Usually that's pretty far off, but for Linda it was surprisingly accurate.

I was ready to accept that I didn't know at all what Linda Looked LIKE, so I had that sensation when you see someone you "know" after they have had their hair or beard cut off and suddenly you can see more of them and they look totally different.

Most of all, my impression was that, given some time to spend together, Linda and I could become the best of friends.

Turns out that Linda's impression of me was that I seem to be a different self with different people - and different mediums of expression.

Signed, the various and sundry Franises...