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Franis
dialoguers
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From A Dialoguer Who Writes
I'm happy to offer the benefit of my observations. I would love to know how or if you can use what I've been exploring here.

If you'd like to contact me personally to get in touch, check out my website.

August 2009
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Franis [userpic]
Losing Capacity = Desparate Control

I used to take care of older seniors. Yesterday I visited a friend of mine who is doing a similar job.

It struck me how many of the concerns of the seniors I took care of then were connected to losing some sort of their physical capacity. I didn't see that until now. Being physically limited was something that happened to me when I was still a teen and nowhere near the end of my life. Comparing how seniors seem so possessive and controlling, I knew well that my limited situation as a teen was a situational attitude and not a result of "getting old." When they lose capacity to make themselves happy, people seem to want to draw the world in which they have control tighter and tighter until they MUST have their way because it's their house, or some other justification. I'm beginning to think that the reason people feel this way because they're losing their capacity to do what they love. Not that they're getting old - it's just a situational set of emotions that occur when you lose the capacity to do what used to make you happy.

Strikes me also as paradoxical how most of the features of what money has to offer is more privacy. When people get old they want company more than privacy.